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Postby jsw » Thu 16 Dec, 2010 4:30 pm

My child can wee on the toilet but still has accidents as he is too lazy to go. How do I teach him not to do this as it seems to be getting worse?
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Re: Toileting.

Postby NeedSomeHelp » Sun 23 Jan, 2011 4:16 pm

Oh I know, my three year old is really lazy too (with poos). DRIVES.ME.MAD! Hope your little one gets it SOOOOON!
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Re: Toileting.

Postby NgalaOnline » Sun 23 Jan, 2011 6:56 pm

Hi Jsw,

Toilet training can be a time that demands a lot of patience from parents, and many parents find it frustrating and draining. It is helpful to remember at this time that your toddler is needing to bring many skills and areas of development together in order to be successful with toileting - this can be hard for children and can take them some time to fully master. Remaining patient and positive with him during this time, even in the face of frustrations, is important. As this is a draining time it can be helpful to seek support from those around you, including seeking some regular time out from caring for your toddler. It is fantastic that your child is having some successes with passing urine on the toilet and it is very helpful to continue to encourage him and show him your pleasure when he experiences these successes.

It is very common for toddlers to become distracted and forget that they need to pass urine. It is also common for children to sometimes not recognise the need to pass urine until it becomes very urgent, or to struggle with removing clothing in time which can result in accidents. Some things that may help reduce accidents are to ask your child if he would like to use the toilet before he begins an activity that he finds absorbing or distracting (such as watching TV or playing with his favourite toys), having a potty nearby incase of urgency, and to dress your child in very simple clothing that are easy for him to quickly remove.

Sometimes children will use toileting accidents as a way to attract attention, as even negative attention can seem worthwhile or entertaining to toddlers. If you notice that he often has accidents when you are busy or distracted, such as when cooking dinner or caring for a baby, you may like to consider toileting him before these activities or using a nappy at this time. It can also be very helpful to ensure your toddler is receiving some one one one positive quality time with you each day doing an activity he enjoys, to reduce his need to seek attention. Toddlers are driven to be seeking independence and autonomy at this stage in their development, and with this comes a testing of boundaries concerning appropriate behaviour. Conflict with caregivers or pressure to toilet can often backfire and make a toddler more determined not to use the toilet, as toddlers can become aware that toileting is one area that they have control over. Showing your pleasure when he toilets successfully, but keeping conflict or discussion about accidents to a minimum can be helpful in allowing your toddler to feel that he is in control of this area of his life.

A consultation or the Parent Education session "Toilet Training" may be helpful for you: ... -Education
This information is general in nature and should not be used as a substitute for the personalized assistance that can be received from the Ngala Helpline by telephone.

For families residing in Western Australia you can also contact the
Ngala Helpline
Telephone 9368 9368 or 1800 111 546 for country access
Available 7 days a week, 8am to 8pm
or request a callback online

For helplines in other Australian states please follow this link
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